Why people love me...

People Envy Your Ingenuity

You're a person with unique ideas, big plans, and a zany outlook on life. Many people look to you for inspiration. People envy your creativity and "who cares?" attitude. They feel very ordinary next to you - and they usually are!

What Do People Envy About You?

THE checklist...

So, I know I've already posted today. But I've been thinking a lot about my checklist. It's up to you as to what I use it for, but this is the first time it's being made public. Please don't steal it. Make your own bitch. This is in no means the entire list. It's quite extensive.

1. Attractive. Superficial? Maybe. But c'mon.
2. Creative. Super important.
3. Sense of humor. I love to make people laugh. You should love to laugh as well.
4. Traveling. I'm not going to be stuck here in the midwest and never get out and see the world.
5. Good in social settings. Should be able to host a killer party, but at the same time be able to be the perfect guest. The perfect socialite.
6. Honest. Duh.
7. Simple, yet complex. Be easy enough to read, but at the same time have some mystery about them.
8. Food. Must be able to cook, appreciate new foods and be able to set an amazing table for a dinner party for 8.
9. Music. Eclectic and classic. Need to have a mix of both.
10. Sweet. I need attention unexpectedly.
11. Sincere. Another duh.
12. Thoughtful. Considerate of me and my circle. Well, and thinks about me...often.
13. Nurturer. I like to feel safe and wanted. At the same time, I want to do the same.
14. Expensive tastes. Appreciates the finer things in life.
15. Intelligent. I want to have deep, meaningful, thought-provoking conversation.
16. Art. Must love art. All forms.
17. Seriousness. Must be able to flip that switch. I don't want to be serious all the time. I live for those moments of pure and simple insanity.
18. Complimentary. I want to know why I'm important.
19. Loveable. Should be able to be loved by all for some reason or another.
20. Helpful. Not like open this jar of pickles for me. When I need help. Help me.
21. Appreciates autonomy. I like being by myself sometimes. You should too.
22. Waiting. Some things are good enough to wait for.
23. Will fight with me. I know, it sounds weird. But it's healthy, to an extent.
24. Forgives. Not just me, but others as well.
25. Writes. Not just everyday writing.
26. Wants family. An extensive family, including friends.
27. Independent. Can do things by themselves. From putting together furniture to taking a walk.
28. Romantic. *bats eyelashes*
29. Cares about themselves.
30. Cares about the earth.
31. Supportive. Will be there for me in any and every endeavor.
32. Lives for me. It would be returned.

I'm addicted to vaginas...

No, it's not what you think. After a long workshop with Indy-Prov, the gang decided to go out for a couple beers and bond. Which we did.

Probably a half an hour into our bonding session I said, "Hey, I saw this really cool game on MySpace. We should play!" The group looked at me in horror after I told them the game was called "The Vagina Game". Okay, so after I just wrote that, I was all like, "What? Am I in third grade?".

Anyway.

What you do is go around the table and say movie titles, replacing the last word in the title with the word "Vagina".

For example: Dude, Where's my vagina!

Disclaimer: If you can't think of a title right away, you drink while you think! You can get drunk pretty easily and you'll be saying vagina all night long!

Have fun with vaginas!!!!! Feel free to leave your own titles on the comments of this entry!

xoxo

I know, I know...

How many times have a made posts on here about communication? Seriously, I'm starting to scare myself into a Dr. Phil coma.

But I'm having problems with people in my life not communicating with me. I think though, it might be partially my fault. Maybe I'm not approachable enough. Maybe they think I'm a delicate flower. Yeah, fuck that.

And from all places. All places. My ex gives me advice. What is this world coming to?

I'm going to go drink some Dran-O.

xoxo

I am full of Christ love...

Pickles...

Ever been in a pickle?

xoxo

Push...

You know, sometimes you just have to push yourself to do better. It's just like in the new Madge song. Well, I've been pushing myself more now. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because I'm turning thirty and I think I don't have as much time left as I used to. But with all this "pushing" I've realized that I need to push myself to be happy. Not live to work, but work to live.

xoxo

Who knew...

I'm apparently Miss Piggy!

You Are Miss Piggy

A total princess and diva, you're totally in charge - even if people don't know it. You want to be loved, adored, and worshiped. And you won't settle for anything less. You're going to be a total star, and you won't let any of the "little people" get in your way. Just remember, piggy, never eat more than you can lift!

The Muppet Personality Test

It's over...

Saturday was the final performance of SISSIES. Im sad that it's all over. We had a great run and the last show was an emotional rollecoaster of smiles and tears. After the show, we went to a local bar and drank and socialized. It was a great time. Oh and, Del Shores' (writer of SBS) ex-boyfriend was at our final performance and told me that he called Del during intermission and he wanted to tell me "Hi". Wow! What a rush! Del emailed me today and said he had nothing but good things to say about the show, so that's was a big ego boost. Okay, now I have some free time on my hands. Anyone want me to work on any special projects for them that include watching TV and getting paid. Just let me know.

xoxo

Mad Props...

So people have been complaining that I never give them props on my blog. So here goes...

Don Jamica. You got mad paper folding skills and you love cherry Kool-Aid.
Lydia. Four color black. What! What?
Randy. As Marcia Brady would say, "You're just so perfect in so many ways. No where's my hairbrush bitch!"
Amber. Love the leather and wip.
Juli. You can't be smart and cute at the same time. Well, you can.
Niki. Yes, you do things to my danger zone no other straight woman can.
Matt. See Don Jamica.
Thor. Great at making out.
Tom. Thanks for the hand job before the baptism.
Ron. Thanks for the air in my ass, but it goes in my head.
Seann. Stop calling me!
Jake. Stop calling me!


Okay, I know I missed like elevnty people and this blog reads more like a high school yearbook for sluts, but I did it.

xoxo

As Britney would say...

Boys. Sometimes a girl just needs one. To love her and to hold. And when a girl is with one. Then she's in control!

So, like I said before, I'm new at this dating thing. I mean, I'm not retarded, I just don't know completely what I'm doing. So when do you do what you do. When is the right time for things. How fast is too fast? How slow is too slow? It seems to me there is no gray area with me. I move too fast or too slow and then I find some way to fuck it up. I'm a relationship bulimic.

And...on Real World Key West, the world got it's first glipse of Robert. The evil doll living in Key West. If you haven't heard about him, or seen him (picture is on the left dumbass) he's quite creepy. You can find more about him here. He scares the shit out of me. He's an evil doll people.

xoxo

Butt thermometers...

I'm gonna keep that butt thermometer for when I'm cooking my hams!

xoxo

This just in...

We just got this wonderful review of the show. Thought I would post it just in case you needed convincing to come see the show.

If anyone hasn't seen this show yet, I say go now. I went last night and was floored by the talent. Ron has gathered a group of talented actors who can portray every emotion down to the letter. Lead Robert Webster was phenomenal. He was able to pull me into every scene of the show. William Skaggs was great. I've known some guys who have been through the same thing he had shown on the stage and was so believeable. Dannon Crews and Thomas Turner rounded out "The Fantasic Four" with some great acting. Dannon played the troubled teen to the letter. Thomas was great. His Wynonna, Dolly, and Shania were great. He definitely added the comic relief of the show that was needed at the right time. Kudos to these four talented actors.
The Supporting cast also added the perfect amount of emotions to this show. Dan Flahive did a great job (especially emoting Ron Spencer in his monologue about Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny) LOL Janet Ransdell is one talented lady. Having playing 3 of the guys' mothers, each one completely different. This was my first time seeing her onstage and I was totally floored! Juli Inskeep and Ron Spencer were the perfect chemistry together! I have always loved watching Ron on stage and to find a woman like Juli to work with him was a great choice! Scott McKenzie played the pianist for the church and the disco bar and I loved watching him back there, adding his own little bit of character in each person, I also loved every time he switched songs and added some songs that not many people would catch unless you're into music.

Overall, a tremendous show that everyone needs to go see! They have a show Sunday, and next Friday and Saturday. If you get a chance, GO SEE IT!!!!!

Sometimes...

Okay, so sometimes you think you've got it bad, when in reality, things are pretty damn good. It's that whole "taking things for granted" concept. Right? Well, I'm starting to realize through all my complaints just how lucky I am.

I had a great weekend. Lots of positive energy, lots of positive experiences. Thunderstorms and the last "Sissies" karaoke night at Ollie's. (tear.)

And this whole "moving" thing is really starting to make me think. Is L.A. really where I NEED to be? Arg, send me your thoughts bitches!

I know, right?

xoxo

So this week on The Real World:Key West, the gay one asked the roomies to go to a gay bar with him. They all agreed and then the retarded one was all like, "Wait, I don't wanna go see old men picking up young boys. I just can't go!". Then the gay one talked her into it. So then they're at the gay bar and the single brain celled one was all like, "This sucks, let's go get some pussy at a real bar!". So the entire cast followed him to some straight bar like a bunch of lost kids at a shopping mall. Then the gay one is like, "Wait. I don't have to go to a straight bar every night. I'm gay and I have to legs of my own that walk where I tell them to walk!" So he and the mixed one goes back to the gay bar.

Later on that night, the gay one and the single brain celled one get into a fight because the straight one wanted everyone at one bar and didn't want to be in the gay bar because he might get tongue fucked or something. And the gay one is like "Every day I live in your world, why can't you give me more the 20 minutes before you go back to putting horse tranquilizers in girls drinks?". And the straight one is all like, "Dude I tried it and I didn't like it, okay!"

So they gay one storms off to bitch about the straight one to the mixed one. And then he's like, "He's right, at least he tried it. We're best friends now!"

Fuck that shit.

I live in straight world nearly 24-7. If I want to go to a gay establishment to be around my people, that's where I'm going to go dammit. I have other straight friends that do this same thing to me. If I even suggest going to a gay bar, they are always like "We always go to gay bars with you". And I'm like "You're right, last June we went to one didn't we!". Live in a gay world 24-7 and we'll talk about it bitches.

xoxo

Like a photocopy...

Do you ever wake up and feel like a photocopy? Like, you were just a copy of yesterday and you've been copied million of times before. And that you are just a a copy of a copy of a copy and so on. No, I'm not on dope. I just had a good night sleep and I'm think with clarity this morning. Don't give me that look, or I'll slap your cocksucker right off your face.

Crash...

What the? Are they serious? Crash best motion picture of the year? What a huge hand job for Hollywood. That's like saying that Fear Factor is the best television show. Granted, it was a well done movie, but in no way was it better than some of the other nominated and I'm not talking just about Brokeback Mountain.

Anyway, it just goes the show that not always does the most deserving get praise.

So, a lot of things have been going on in my life the last couple days. I've been thinking a lot about the past. Why you ask? Well, I think we learn from our past experiences. Unfortunately, I think there are some people in this world that can't move past their past. Did that make sense? Okay, so what happens if you've been hurt by someone in the past? Would you rule them out of your life completely? I know it probably depends on what really happened. But, in most cases, I wouldn't. People are far too vaulable for me to just put aside. Nor do I ever want to replace people in my life because I have the inability to think or act for myself.

Oh, I'm being far too cryptic. Just know this. People are in your lives for a reason. Each has a purpose. They may enter and leave your life leaving a mark on your life as they come and go. It's a good thing.

Oh, and drunk people are funnier when you're not drunk.

xoxo

The trickle effect...

News is starting to trickle down about my recent decision to move. I've had every response from "have fun waiting tables", to "see you back here in a year", to "that's awesome, you'll love it". Fuckers. :)

Anyway, the most unexpected response was from the ex. He really didn't say I should or shouldn't. It was just a very thoughtful and sincere letter. It's crazy, he even said in the email, he was always afraid my interest in "the industry" was something that would tear us apart. Interestingly enough, it never would have. I had several opportunities to move out there with him for other jobs and I had always chosen him over L.A.

Last night, when I got home from Indy-Prov's first show at Locals Only, I watched the Project Runway I TIVO'd from Wednesday. I realized some things. One, Santino will win and two, there are so many other things I want to try in my life. I want to learn to sew. I want to try a completely different career path. I want to be a chef. I want to manage my checkbook better. I'm not getting any younger, I need to get out and do this shit now.

So, I got a part-time job as a cigarette bitch to save money for the move. You know, those girls out at bars that scan you ID, give you free cigarettes and then you get like 8000 postcards from Camel every second for the rest of your life? Yeah, one of those bitches. So that's that. And, Hopefully I'll be getting another part-time gig bartending. Hopefully with my top off.

Oh and I almost forgot. The Real World Key West premiere. Now, there are only a few reasons I watched it. One, I'm starting a segment on the Pop Culture Countdown about reality television. Two, Key West is my second favorite city. And three, I had already watched the paint dry on my wall. Okay, these bastard are nuts. Completely nuts. They're all like retarded versions of former castmates. Well, most of them anyway. I mean, I'm no dummy either. Editing can be quite a slap in the face. What you see isn't always what's really going on. But, these kids need pills.

Okay enough of my drabble. Off to show one of three tonight. I counted a lot in this entry. Sorry!

xoxo